Only 10 minutes...

Judge to a pickpocket : "Since you have been found guilty of the offence of pick pocketing you are fined Rs.1000."

Defense Counsel: "Sir you have fined my client Rs.1000 and right now he has only Rs.800..."

Judge: "I will not lesson the fine."

Counsel: "No Sir! I was just asking that my client be given only 10 minutes in a crowd....!"

The Merit...!

A judge called both side lawyers in his chamber.

Judge: Mr. A you gave me Rs.25000 from plaintiffs side for a decision in your favor.

Mr. A feeling ashamed looks at judge.

Judge: Mr. B you gave me Rs.20000 for a decision in your favor.


Mr. B also feeling ashamed looks at judge.

Judge: Mr. A!! Here are your Rs.5000 you paid extra..... And now as you both have paid equally the case shall be decided on merit....!

Fit & Tested Dieting Plan...???

Fit & Tested Dieting Plan with tremendous results...

7:30am - 1 brawn bread, half boiled egg.

10:00am - 1 cup green tea

12:00pm - half cup boiled chanay

1:00pm - 1 banana

5:00pm - 1 cup tea without sugar

7:00pm - 1 cup skimmed milk

9:00pm - green tea
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11:45pm - naan, chicken karahi, fried rice, tikka, shahi tukray, pizza, chocolate cake, pastry, gulab jaman, ice cream, aur 1 diet pepsi...

Strange but true...

When the relation is new..people find reasons to meet...but when it becomes old..people find EXCUSES to Avoid...Strange but True...!

Ahhh...PIA

A man find a beautiful girl at an airport cafe, sitting next to him.
He thinks: She must be an air hostess but which airline?
Hoping to get her attention, he leans towards her and says Emirates slogan: "Keep discovering"
She ignores him.
Again he says United Air's slogan: "It's time to fly"
No Response!
Again says another airline's slogan. She turns to him & says: "Ki takleef aey haraam deya?"
Man laughs, leans back & says: "Ahhh...PIA"

Love is like...

Love is like a game of chess:
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One wrong move...
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...and you are married...!

A typing error in book title...

Million copies of a new book sold in just two days due to a typing error in book title...
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The title was...
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"An Idea can change your Wife (Life)"

How to kill an Ant?

Q: How to kill an Ant?
Asked in exam for 15 marks.

Student:"...Mix Chilli Powder with Sugar & keep it outside the Ant's Hole. After eating, Ant will search for some water near a water tank. Push Ant in to it. Now Ant will go to dry itself near fire. When it reaches fire, put a bomb in to the fire. Then admit wounded Ant in ICU. Remove oxygen mask from it's mouth n kill the Ant."

MORAL:
Don't play with students they can do any thing for 15 marks...!

Ear Transplant....

Doctor transplant a new ear to man.

Man: You Fraud! You gave me a woman's ear...

Doctor: look it makes no difference.

Man: It does...! Now I hear everything but understand nothing...!

Silence of a friend...

Thousand words of a teacher does not hurt.

BUT

The silence of a friend in the Examination Hall brings tears in to the eyes. (William Naqalbaz)